Fly Me To The Moon

Written by Josh Harding on 27 December 2005

This just in……

Get your tickets fast. The Russians are at it again. First, they gave rides in their fighter jets. Then they put a tourist in the International Space Station. Now they are offering the chance of a lifetime…a tour to the moon.

That’s right folks, step right up. For only 100 million dollars, you, yes you, can take a two week vacation to the moon. Imagine all the thrills and chills you will get flying to the earth’s only natural satellite and cruising around that big ball o’cheese for 5-6 days before returning to earth.

Think of it all. 15 days of weightlessness, astronaut food, defecation into little bags, smelling the cockpit after someone defecated into a little bag…and the list goes on and on.

It’s not recommended that you take your kids, though. Can you imagine after the first 10,000 miles when the “Are we there yet?”, “I’m bored”, “Johnny’s touching me.” start up. There will be no pit stops, no McDonald’s playgrounds, and even your kids won’t believe your threats of turning the space capsule around and going home.

So far there haven’t been any takers, so be the first to take a vacation to the moon. Mars tour packages will be available sometime after 2030 when the first Russian piloted mission is expected.

Further Reading:
Russian news article


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#1 Chad Cloman 27 December 2005 at 03:40 pm

If I recall correctly, you don’t actually get to land on the moon and walk around; rather, you orbit the moon and then come back. Seems like a shame to go all that distance just for a look.

#2 Chad Cloman 27 December 2005 at 03:43 pm

English explanation of the trip is here:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/space/article/0,14493,1536818,00.html

And yes, all you get is an orbit of the moon.

#3 Querl 27 December 2005 at 05:16 pm

I feel comfortable taking a look up at night for those moon gazing cravings. 100 million is just a bit outside my budget for asrtonomical amusement.

#4 Alex 27 December 2005 at 06:54 pm

100 million dollars would be better used buying candy. Think of all that candy!

#5 rochellelyn 27 December 2005 at 10:02 pm

Alex said: “100 million dollars would be better used buying candy. Think of all that candy!”

Very good point . . .

#6 Secret Ninja 27 December 2005 at 11:23 pm

A 100 million dollar shopping spree at DEAL$!

#7 Oliver Zheng 28 December 2005 at 12:29 am

100M rubles or USD? 100M rubles would probably get you a cheeseburger in the states.

#8 Josh Harding 28 December 2005 at 05:43 am

Oliver Zheng said: “100M rubles or USD? 100M rubles would probably get you a cheeseburger in the states.”

I would take 100 million rubles in a heartbeat. The current exchange is about 30/dollar. That’s a sizable chunk of change.

Chad Cloman said: “If I recall correctly, you don’t actually get to land on the moon and walk around; rather, you orbit the moon and then come back. Seems like a shame to go all that distance just for a look.”

When I wrote cruising, I meant orbiting, not driving. Sorry if it was a bit ambiguous.

#9 Cocopuff 28 December 2005 at 11:33 am

Maybe all the members of N’SYNC can contribute to this one, and get a group rate. Do they sell one way tickets?

#10 Josh Harding 28 December 2005 at 11:43 am

Cocopuff said: “Maybe all the members of N’SYNC can contribute to this one, and get a group rate. Do they sell one way tickets?”

You wouldn’t even have to put them in the rocket…just tell them they need to help push start it. Crackle, crackle, crackle and the problem is solved.

#11 Oax 28 December 2005 at 10:02 pm

WOW! That’s great! who wouldn’t wanna go for that long in a spacecraft built by the Russians?

wonder if they’d take a check…
or
wonder if they’d take a czech…

#12 Vishal 29 December 2005 at 05:54 pm

Speaking of a trip to the moon can we have an article on the moon conspiracy?

#13 NuTT98 16 March 2006 at 03:27 am

Paying for a trip to space with the Russians is like paying to dig your own grave. No thanks, I’ll hitch a ride with the Americans.

#14 Sarge 02 April 2007 at 12:50 pm

One hundred mill for candy? What about pie.

#15 Merciless 12 June 2007 at 10:43 am

How about candy covered pie?

The bad thing is someone will pay that much to go. I meant waste.

#16 lizdini 13 June 2008 at 10:04 pm

Sad as it may be, if I had 100 million dollars (rubles…marbles…whatever it is they’re taking) I’d do it in a heartbeat. baggie defecation & all. It’s the freakin’ moon!

#17 allduerespect88 07 December 2008 at 11:41 pm

I wouldnt be able to bring myself to spent 100 million on something like this. Seems selfish to me. Think of how many lives you could save with that kinda money.

#18 allduerespect88 07 December 2008 at 11:43 pm

And I’m not just saying that cos I’m going for miss america. I think being male would disqualify me anyway, and, come to think of it I’m not America either. Hmmm seems I don’t tick too many of those boxes.

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Fly Me To The Moon