Spring Break, Damnit

Damn you. You’re not allowed take breaks. Get you and your million monkeys back to their type writers!

Only kidding. Enjoy yourseleves this week! Hopefully staying above a type 6 on the Bristol Scale.

Always,
Craven Morhead

What… April Fools on April 2nd?

Say what, you’re not kidding… Awww.

All right enjoy the time off.

Oh, and this quote

“For those who appreciate apologies… sorry, we can’t help you. “

is not the “sorry” a form of apology, or just a really frustrating game?

I think everyone deserves a break. ‘Cept that Alan Bellows character….

speaking of which… SO help me god if my magnet isnt here in pristine condition.

That is all. =)

…you’re welcome to play Russian Roulette with our archives.

I’m wondering how exactly I’m going to die by reading the wrong article. Hmm…

Metamucil, Tequilia, and Cherry Pie WOOHOO should be one heck of a vacation!!

Son of a fiddlesticks.

That’s dumber than a one-eyed toe. Have fun.

I’ve had a Damn Brain hemorrhage anyway from the recent articles…awesome. I probably need a break myself…just to get ready for the next Damn dose. Thanks Alan and team for kicking pie.

…up to the lips, pass the gums, look out stomach…here it comes!!!

…and then, boredom set in.

well…hope ya enjoy ur holidays…itll give ya time to think of a super-mega-hyper-giga-jumbo-brain-food-ish article for ur return ;-D

Enjoy it!! Looking forward to April 9th.

Great work all around on the site, Bellows and Company™. Enjoy your vacation.

On the surface, I am unaffected by this. But deep down, there is a part of me – the part that gets really bored at work – that is crying its eyes out. Back to throwing Family Guy quotes back and forth with my coworkers for me! Giggidy.

rev.felix said: “I’m wondering how exactly I’m going to die by reading the wrong article. Hmm…”

You may not die, but you might just encounter an article about something like the Terrifying Toothpick Fish and become permanently scarred.

That’s some mighty fine pie you’ve got there. Definitely a good start to a spring break! mmmhmm.

They say the pen is mightier than the sword…perhaps you’ll get stuck if you read the wrong one. 19th century ink poisoning…what an outdated way to go.

Am I the only one who’s noticed that DI spends more time down than up? For every 2 articles we get, there’s a week of database problems, temporary delays, or vacation… Great site, for sure, but seriously… spring break? You just got back up and running from your last break.

“Mmmmmmmmm, cheese-flavored . . . ” (sound of Cheez Whiz being squirted into mouth).

Don’t know if it’s a bug or a feature, but as an anonymous visitor I could only get 1 article with the random link – “The Flying Saucers of North America”.

Of course, after making this account just to point this fact out, the random thing starts working. I guess anon visitors don’t deserve such goodness ;)

Too bad I’ve read all these already :-P

I misread somebody’s comment above to read “For every 2 DUI’s we get, you take a vacation”… or something along those lines. My brain is turning to mush without my DI.

You guys should write two articles a week, publish one, and hang on to the other until you take a break again.
When you have 5-10 saved, you could go back to two a week, but you’d have to write three/week after your breaks to make up for the deficit(or if you’re busy, you could do it later).

Also, this text box uses the system font(white for me) and a white background so I can’t see what I’m typing without using notepad…

Add color: #ffffff; to textarea.replyBox in your stylesheet to fix the text system color problem…

Nicki the Heinous said: “You may not die, but you might just encounter an article about something like the Terrifying Toothpick Fish and become permanently scarred.”

*sits rocking in a corner thinking about the terrible toothpick fish*

*eye twitch*

I remember when an article was pumped out seemingly daily. Although it kept me infinitely entertained, I would rather be rather entertained some of the time than barely able to bear it all of the time. Keep taking breaks as often as you need to keep yourselves from committing suicide, the world is a better place with you.

when you get back…dont write an article that has a black and white picture with it, or has something to do with a truck that drives good, or a military ship that was mysteriously lost…or anything that will start an argument on evolution (God knows how that ends up) please, swee jesus, dont.

anything that will start an argument on evolution (God knows how that ends up)

Or does he?…

I clicked to play Russian Roulette and got an article that said sorry we will come out with more later

weeeiiirddd

another viewpoint said: “…up to the lips, pass the gums, look out stomach…here it comes!!!

…and then, boredom set in.”

LOL Check this one out:
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=527

another viewpoint said: “…up to the lips, pass the gums, look out stomach…here it comes!!!

…and then, boredom set in.”

LOL Check this one out:
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=527
or this one:
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=537
Here is one more:
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=133

OOps! Now, how did that happen?!! Soooorrrreeey. :)

Why would anyone want a book maggot?

codepoet80 said: “Am I the only one who’s noticed that DI spends more time down than up? For every 2 articles we get, there’s a week of database problems, temporary delays, or vacation… Great site, for sure, but seriously… spring break? You just got back up and running from your last break.”

Well Database problems are not DI’s fault but rather the hosting company that DI goes through. Its hard to find any hosting company that doesn’t have problems of some kind at some point or another.

Given that MOST of the articles posted come from Alan, and he has stated on a regular basis that DI is not his day job and doesn’t pay the bills I think some slack could be cut. Cranking out the kind of high quality writing we see here cant be a quick feat. I would wager it takes him the better part of a day to write a story. That’s time away from a regular job that makes money, and to do that twice a week or more means he likely wouldn’t see much down time between working and writing. Not to mention people often have family commitments as well. I don’t know the situation with the other writers for why we almost never see anything from them any more, but it does appear that Alan is the one holding this site together. So if he needs a break every now and again I say give it to him. We all need days off from work, and sometimes writing can be work.

okay come back now.

Fun site, about to get more so.

Ok ,Alan, it’s April 9th,where is the new article?! Huh?! Where!?!

(Tapping fingers on desk)…Waiting.

Lol, hope you all had a great time and lots of pie! Can’t wait for the newest expulsion from your marvelouse grey matter!

Comment #34 (April 8th, 2007 at 10:17 pm)

Tink said: “Ok ,Alan, it’s April 9th,where is the new article?! Huh?! Where!?!

(Tapping fingers on desk)…Waiting.

Lol, hope you all had a great time and lots of pie! Can’t wait for the newest expulsion from your marvelouse grey matter!”

Hey, yall need to update the time thingy, it is 12:18AM here. whats up with that? Last I knew we were maybe in differing zones, but not datelines!
(Oh My God, do ya think Alan finialy got that time machine working!? Wow, and he realy fooled us into thinking he was writing a damned book! Whoowee, I’m packed and ready, lets go!)

April 9… hurry up with the next DI article already!

Yea…. I’m ready for a new article… I mean i don’t want to rush you or anything, buuuuuuuttttt I need my fix.

Sabyrne said: “Yea…. I’m ready for a new article… I mean i don’t want to rush you or anything, buuuuuuuttttt I need my fix.”

Alan says:We will return in one week– on 09 April 2007– with more pasteurized, processed, cheese-flavored brain food.

Lalalalala…huma,huma,humma… grrrr*%#@$+!!!Feeeed the machine; it has a life of its own now, and it wants you, Alan, it wants you bad! LOL

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=damnit

IT’S SPELLED DAMMIT!

Hope you enjoyed your cherry pie on spring break.